Based on my experience, a global pandemic will leave a person feeling one of two ways.
Either you:
a) feel like you're standing in four feet of water in the ocean, getting pummeled by a series of waves, just tall and rough enough that you can’t seem to stand up and take a breath.
or
b) feel like you’re standing on a paddle board watching those same waves from farther out in the ocean.
Positioned above the waves and farther out gives a sense of control of the situation. You’re past the point of the waves breaking over you. And you know, that when you lose your balance, you can re-center yourself by watching the horizon, taking some controlled breaths.
If you lose your balance and fall, you can get back on the board and start again.
Leaders are managing themselves every day in this situation. Self-management and regulation has been mission-critical, as we’ve all weathered the unpredictable storms and and at times, undertow, that may leave others shaken by the experience.
This experience has not only taught me a great deal about myself, and what I am capable of accomplishing. It has also defined and redefined my purpose.
Leadership is servant leadership.
There is no question that there have been many times through my adult life where I’ve faulted or blamed others, for what it turns out has been my own shortcomings. This experience, however, has taught me many things, most of which involve asking strong questions, and creating the space to receive and listen to feedback.
Discovering my own purpose is an ongoing endeavor, but I am getting closer every day. The Harvard Business Review article 5 Questions to Help Your Employees Find Their Inner Purpose will help leaders serve others better. The following are questions include my responses.
Before asking those in the organization a leader serves, it’s important for a leader to engage in “the work” of personal self-reflection. This builds context for empathy and models self-reflection. Taking care of myself will help me better serve others.
The questions, with my responses:
What are you good at doing?
Creating calm situations that create space for active listening and for empathy. By de-escalating a situation, we gain a sense of control, of our emotions. Doing this gets to the heart of the matter, which ultimately will result in helping someone.
What do you enjoy?
Being with and around kids and teachers. On my busiest and most stressful days, I remember what drains my energy and what gives me energy. Scheduling time to engage in experiences that energize me give me energy needed to manage the more draining tasks.
What feels most useful?
Working in coordination with a others who are focused on a shared outcome, but who see the experience through different lenses makes me feel useful. Being able to contribute my unique perspective while gaining an appreciation for the perspectives of others help me to learn, and make me better.
What creates a sense of forward momentum?
At my core, I know I only want to help others succeed. Taking my time in the classroom, the school, and through other larger group settings has helped me to see value in scaling a vision. Attaching actions that move progress from the leader to the organization drive me to serve others.
How do you relate to others?
Taking action around my core values help center me so I can be at my personal best. Surrounding myself with those who see the world differently than I do reminds me of the interconnected complexity of our relationships. At the same time, by putting myself in situations that challenge me to think differently, help me grow.
Each day we get to choose whether we get relentlessly sacked by the ocean waves or paddle out and find our balance, focusing on the horizon.
Either way, we get to decide whether (or not) to stand up and give it another try.